But Someone Might Play With These Happy Meal Toys! (& Other Decluttering Myths) – Mommy Lie #10
Since we got married in 2007, my husband and I have added three lovely children to our home. With the three children, our stuff multiplied, not by three, but by 6,984. We know have so. much. extra. stuff. We have the extra necessities, of course – clothing, water bottles, jackets, bike helmets…but also, we have other RANDOM stuff. We have stuff that I don’t even know what it is, or where it came from, or what a child is actually supposed to do with it.
Just to prove my point, I took a leisurely stroll through our beautiful home this evening. You know, while the kids were squashing bars of soap down the shower drains, and kicking soccer balls off the fireplace.
Anyway, I snapped some pictures on this beautiful stroll, of Objects That Live In Our Home. These are objects we see,
love trip over, and throw in the toy box daily. I thought I would share this little collection of artifacts I discovered today.
Oh, before I elaborate on this special object, can everyone please notice my unmatching socks. In my defense, I had on matching socks, before The People dropped ice cubes all over and made sneaky piles of freezing cold water all over the floor. Anyway.
This object was in its former life some sort of a Launching Device. It had these little foam parts that originally, back in the 17th century, would fly up in the air. It was kind of cool. Recently, however, one of the legs snapped in half, and the Launchers have vanished. But don’t worry. We still hang on to this beauty. Just in case, you know.
This is a key-chain holder. To something. I am 98% sure it attaches to something important. However, I have no earthly idea what.
Oh, every boy needs a matchbox car. Or, 739 of them. Because that is what we have.
Someone loved this little gem so much they took a bite out of it. Literally.
This is a steering wheel. A steering wheel to nowhere. That sort of sounds like the name of a good country song, now, doesn’t it? A steering wheel to nowhere. So, you can see why I haven’t parted with this.
Or this. It’s some sort of a tool. I would tell you what it is, except I have no earthly idea what it is. I have literally never seen my children play with it. In the history of the universe.
Now, listen. If you were one of my friends, and you were showing me these things, I have hasten to my unsolicited advice.
Dude! Get rid of this stuff already! Go get a yard-sized trash bag and dump these useless items away! Why in the world have you been picking these things up every day, for the last 72 months of your life?
But while it can be very obvious to the outsiders, the truth is, Decluttering While Raising Children actually presents its share of challenges.
Here are a few. (Maybe you can relate).
- I don’t want to throw all this stuff away because one day, someone might actually ask where it is, and want to play with it! (gasp!)
- What if I have more children? And what if they want to play with this?? Then I’ll have to buy another, and that wouldn’t be very frugal, would it???
- I hate this object with a passion, but I don’t actually know what to do with it. It seems wasteful to throw it away, but it’s too disgusting to offer to Goodwill, and I have no idea when I’ll have a garage sale…
- I hate this object with a passion, but I have no time to figure out a good thing to do with it, so I will just throw it back in it’s home with Other Random Kid Objects.
For the first time in my Parenting Life, I feel like I have a plan.
This plan is a book, actually. This book. The Life-Changing Magic Of Tidying Up. I bet many of you have heard of it, maybe “done it.” Apparently a lot of you have, because I have been trying to reserve this book at the library for about 145 days, and I finally gave up when I realized I was number 23 on the wait list, and it would be another two years before it was my turn. 🙁
So, I bought it. 🙂 I am ELATED to read it.
I’ve actually starting talking to the toys, in my head. For the last few weeks, I have been glaring them down thinking, “You just wait. JUST YOU WAIT. I’m gonna get that book, and I CANNOT WAIT to get rid of you. Enjoy the last few weeks of your life, buddy.”
I have my friend Stacy to thank. I’ve been so inspired as I’ve watched her Instagram “KonMari” journey of decluttering. You should all follow her, because she’s amazing. And the decluttering journey she’s shared with us has nearly brought me to tears many a day.
It is what I have wanted to do all my life, but not had the tools to do it.
I have never been more excited in my life to clean my entire house.
Have you heard of or done the KonMari method? How’d you like it?
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